Thursday, August 16, 2012

Cha-Cha Changes...

It happens ever so often that things change pretty dramitically... in our case historically, it has usually been for the worst. Thankfully yesterday we started on our latest change which is hopefully just the first in a string of great changes for our future. Yesterday we closed on our new home, something we have been working towards and waiting on for a considerable amount of time.

We have been prepping for this change in a number of ways for a very long time. Of course to help kiddo cope with changes, we are extremely open with all things that may happen, will happen in the future or happen soon. If we can we start discussing the changing event as soon as we have an inkling it is going to happen, that way there is plently of time for kiddo to get more comfortable with the idea of it. And so it happened with the house hunting and purchase. We have been looking for a home for close to a year now, so the discussions of a new living situation and location have been floating through our apartment for a while just in normal converstation. This is the easiest possible way to do things with kiddo, he has a long lead way to think about things and what he does or does not like about it. It also gives us plenty of time to adjust in ways to help him moving forward. The worst possible thing I can do in changes like this is to spring it on him... I can just expect to get the atomic meltdowns with regularity.

With the discussions about moving, the only real conflict we have run into with regards to kiddo and Lil Sis' feelings about the move have been about changing schools agian and leaving friends. The leaving of friends is always more of a concern for Lil Sis as she is a social butterfly. But this time around, Kiddo also had his reservations because he finally made a friend. 

It has been hard for Kiddo to build relationships with peers, something not uncommon for many Aspies. So this past year when he developed a friendship with a boy in his class, it would be a grave understatement to say that I was overjoyed... I literally cried about it when he called the boy his friend. His mom and I worked to maintain the friendship over the summer, but now that school is just around the corner, he will now be starting school in a new county, away from his friend. 

When talking about the move, Kiddo did ask me about what school he would be going to. We talked about how we would now be back into a house and we had to make some changes for that like going to a new school. I promised him that we would not be moving again for a good long time and I would do whatever I needed to do to try to help him in his new setting. He wasn't happy about it, but with the knowledge that his friend's mom and I will continue to get them together on weekends, he seems a little more content about things. 

Both kiddos are excited about decorating thier new rooms, as are we. So like many times when things are changing alot for us, I have the great David Bowie playing regularly in my head as we look forward to face the strain with our changes. 


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