Good...Bad....I'm the guy with the gun...err...hand mixer
So the other day I was preparing breakfast for the Kiddo and
Lil' sis', good ole' scrambled eggs smothered in cheddar cheese (the cheese was
there more so to hide any egg whites that I didn't whisk in completely because
kiddo has this thing about egg whites) I thought I did a pretty good job
in the whisk and cover mission and served up the bowls to the children.
"Ugh, I hate egg whites" is the first sentence I was greeted with.
The mission was clearly not as successful as I had first believed. "Just eat
it, there's no difference" I
replied to him. "They taste white" he shot back." They taste white? I
was caught off guard by this, how can egg whites taste like a color? Sensory
integration. Kiddo is very sensitive to tastes, textures, and temperatures. I gave that bowl of eggs hell, Serena Williams
arms would have been sore if she whisked it like I did....and still the egg
whites showed their ugly heads. I swear I could hear the eggs in the fridge
laughing at me, calling me crude names, even this morning I heard a "your
grandma can whisk better than you...."
I had
gotten comfortable with the notion that my eggs would always show the white,
and that I would be left to use the archaic metal whisk or (gasp) fork. I told
myself, "I'll just add more cheese, everyone loves cheese."
Then
one day, after our move, Mom opened up a box that I had forgotten about....a
box that held a Cuisinart Smart stick
hand mixer. I watched as she put together a fruit shake for us one Monday
morning, it quickly and easily blended frozen strawberries and blueberries, so
quiet, so quick, so graceful...it kind of sounded like the saw used in
"Hannibal"....but that's a
post for another blog...I digress. Even
then I had not put too much thought into the use of it with eggs, I just saw it
as a neat toy, I mean come on, I'm a car guy, I am enamored by air compressors
and cylinder hones, not some kitchen tool.
That
all changed the other day. I happen to be on vacation this week (staycation,
cause a move into a house brings lots of work) so I let Mom sleep in and I got
the kids moving for school. A glance in the fridge returned the conformation of
no milk, along with a few verbal jabs from those eggs again. So the fall back
bowl of cereal was out of the question. I suck at cooking, I blow no smoke
about this, so I told myself eggs- I can do eggs. I cracked 4 of those trash
talking bastards into a bowl, then as I was grabbing a few other ingredients I
remembered the mixer. Well let's give it a go, shall we. I transferred the
contents of the bowl to the neat mixing cup provided, connected the blade end
and plunged it into the unbeaten mixture
and pushed the button.
Dear god in heaven.
This is the greatest invention known to man. I felt like Ash
from "Army of Darkness", I even held it above my head and yelled,
"THIS IS MY BOOM STICK!!" There were no egg whites missed that day.
Kiddo ate the whole plate of scrambled eggs and did not once say anything about
something tasting white. My mission here is done, now I can go back to working
the House wares section of S-Mart. Shop smart...shop S-Mart.
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